General Forum - Help! Need an opening line for my Groom speech on Saturday! - Page 1

Do an elephant impression. Always go down well.

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We're on a baby hunt and don't think
we don't know how to weeeeeed 'em out.

How on earth does that work?

You turn the pockets of your trousers inside out for the ears and then undo your flies and pull out the trunk...

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We're on a baby hunt and don't think
we don't know how to weeeeeed 'em out.

A classic one I've heard a few times:
Quote:
This is the second time today I have stood up from a warm seat with a piece of paper in my hand...

Oh, and if I remember correctly you are perhaps not the tallest of people Bezza...its good to be self-deprecating.
Something along the lines of "yes I am standing up"...or making a point of getting a yellow pages to stand on. etc. etc.
People always warm to someone who's willing to take the mick out of themselves first.

No offence intended by it, just trying to help with the humour!

"Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life."
-Terry Pratchett.

This item was edited on Thursday, 10th July 2008, 10:09

I said 'Thankyou....as you know...im a man of few words' and sat back down again.

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What im listening to (if youre interested)
Newly MySpaced fwiw *Updated..badly*

Start off with pretending you're finishing a conversation with someone without knowing the microphone was on, followed by a cough of embarassment, then it depends how risky you can go:

"...with enough sherry to last the entire journey"
"...so I gave her a pearl necklace"
"...she said spit on it, you're tearing me"

UQ Web Design | Offensive 101

"...but this one's eating my popcorn."

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We're on a baby hunt and don't think
we don't know how to weeeeeed 'em out.

dont use the warm seat one.....I've heard it at every wedding i've been to

Also you could say somet like 'well i just have a few words to say' hold your paper up in front of you as if your just about to read it and let it unravel down to the floor and beyond.....

Quote:
Also you could say somet like 'well i just have a few words to say' hold your paper up in front of you as if your just about to read it and let it unravel

And I've seen something like that at every wedding I've been to!

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We're on a baby hunt and don't think
we don't know how to weeeeeed 'em out.